It's so upsetting to admit to it...but I finally SERIOUSLY fell off the lovely vegan wagon. Sweets are my downfall...I began a new job, and they waste SO much food. I can't stand it, so I began eating a desert at work, and bringing some home (they're sadly not hooked up with a food bank like they should be...but I'll have to look into why). Anywho, I've been eating far too many desserts (food in general really...). And realizing this made me want to eat more, and more, and more. On top of an upsetting break up, stress from college searching and summer AP Homework, I've been ridiculous! So ridiculous that I'm at my heaviest weight...when I looked at the scale, I stepped off and re-weighed myself, I couldn't believe it. I went from 128 after a short one day fast to 139 in roughly a month...but it piled on mostly in the past week. It's extremely unhealthy, and I'm hoping to lose 15lbs before school starts; probably not extremely healthy either, but when I gained that much so quickly it calls for drastic measures! I keep waking up every morning with 'it's a new day to begin veganism again!' but i can't seem to follow through a full day...if anybody can offer motivation it'd be greatly appreciated. Also, I plan on getting a juicer tomorrow so I can begin a juice fast and cleanse myself of all the refined sugar in my body.
Thanks a bunch and I hope to be back in this splendid vegan lifestyle very soon!

peace&love

Kelly

Be sure you pack your own lunch everyday, and promise yourself not to eat the food from your work. If you make it all day then you can give yourself a little reward at the end of the day. for example: make up the peanut butter cups in Alicia's book and freeze them and eat just one at the end of the day, to celebrate a good vegan day.

Find out if there is a farm nearby that would be willing to pick up the excess food each day that is wasted at work. All the employees would have to do is throw it in it's own seperate bucket, rather than the trash can. The farmer can come by and get the goodies.

One of the most depressing things is seeing how much food companies waste. Especially when it's animal products, when animals had to suffer and for nothing because the food wasn't even eaten.

At my last job we had food catered so much and I could never eat anything. Not at all. Sometimes they would have vegetarian stuff, but never vegan. Sometimes I would bring home food for my boyfriend (he's not vegan) just because I didn't want it wasted. But i'd never be able to eat it myself. That switch has turned off in my head and I'll never consume animal products again.

Your idea of seeing why you guys are linked up to a food bank is a good idea. Food should not be wasted like that.

If you're really craving sweets then there are plenty of vegan sugary snacks. Or you could make them yourself as well and freeze them like the idea above.

Check out the book "Breaking the Food Seduction" by Dr. Neal Barnard. He talks about simple steps/tricks to get rid of cravings. His whole approach is somewhat encouraging: cravings and "cheating" don't depend on one's determination and willpower as much as on an imbalance in your body, as well as the addictive qualities of the foods we crave. It's very interesting. Good read. Great tips.

KDob, don't be too hard on yourself. As long as you learned something you shouldn't beat yourself up. You're human, it happens. This just reaffirms your feelings on why you want to stay vegan. Usually if you gain weight quickly it is actually easy and fast to drop it as well. So just do your best at being vegan and drink a lot of water to flush your system. I am sure you will feel better in no time. 

Whenever I want to stick with I just watch some footage of animals being tortured. It makes me so nauseas that I stop craving things.

Good luck to you.

Rachel - That's precisely the problem! I can't stand the fact that all of the suffering happened just for it to be thrown out, but I feel even worse when I'm the one eating it, because I know it's really the last thing I want in my system (although my tastebuds rather enjoy it).

Debs - I've heard of the book, I may have even checked it out...but clearly I didn't retain anything if I read it. I'll certainly be making a trip to the Library soon, Thanks (:

Terra - I've thought about flooding myself with the videos, and I'm sure that's the only thing that will shock me back into being a strict vegan. I've been 100% vegan today, and I feel great! I definitely need to drink lots of liquids to flush out my system, and to fill up my stomach with water opposed to food. And hopefully the weight will drop as quickly as it came on...I just found out today that we're getting weighed in for tennis before and after practices, so some weight has to come off before I step on that scale!

Thanks to all of you, and hopefully I'll be back on the highroad shortly!

peace&love

Kelly

KDob I am glad you feel better today for eating 100% vegan. I was vegan 100% for 2 years and then moved and I didn't have a choice so I was stuck eating food I didn't want in my body or around me. But as soon as I move back I will be 100% vegan for good and nobody and nothing will pressure me to do otherwise. I was beating myself up about it but I learned a lot and it just made me realize that everything I believed in was not only the healthiest thing for me but the best thing for me and not just in my head. I always felt like I was missing out and I know now that I didnt miss a single thing. Now I wake up craving veggies. When I see a commercial on the tv I drool over the salad. So Even though it was a big step back I am going to dust myself off and start new. As long as I am traveling in the right direction I am going to stop beating myself up. 

Hopefully you can do the same. Don't even look at the scale. You're perfect the way you are and no number is going to change that.